by Sicheng Su

It was smart of Toyota to make the xB. It looked so distinctive, you could almost forgive its ugliness and tiny engine. In fact, it’s probably a good sign for Toyota that I hate this car, because if I hate it this much, there must be other people who absolutely love it. Nonetheless, the fact remains — I hate it. 

I hate it because it looks horrendous. From the back and the sides, it looks like a giant toaster on wheels. From the front, it looks like a transformer born with a hugely deformed jaw. And, its squarish looks make the car age really fast. In fact, the harsh lack-of-curves were distinctive for it as new car precisely because they look old – no one’s made a car like that in over a decade! It’s only been few years since they were first introduced and already the xBs on the road are starting to look as ancient as my solid-steel microwave whose only button is a knob for the timer. Even the dashboard reminds me of a 1950s Mini Cooper. Also, a 1.5 liter engine on this car seems terribly insufficient, especially when carrying any passengers or cargo heavier than a Furby.

But at least it’s different. At least Toyota went all the way with their idea. And at least the small engine could make up for its terrible aerodynamics in great gas mileage. The new xB is much worse …. 
 
The old xB is like that awkward kid on the block who seemed strange, different, and funny looking at first, but then made it to the head of the pack (deformed jaw and all). It looks sharp and has an attitude. I don’t like it, but at least it holds its ground. The new xB, on the other hand, is like the old xB’s equally awkward little brother (you can tell they’re related by the genetic bulging jaw defect) who tried to imitate his older brother in every way but never really quite succeeded. Everything about it is softer and more cushy, even down to the colors available. Although length has increased, actual head- and legroom has shrunk. The dashboard has actually gotten worse – instead of a 1950s Mini, it now looks like a 1950s Cessna cockpit. And even though they freshened up the exterior, it still looks like an ugly transformer with a lower jaw deformity. The one saving grace of this car is they’ve now put in a 2.4 liter, so at least it’ll have a good amount of power, but that massive engine upsize combined with the extra 500lbs of curb weight means gas mileage has gone way down – 28mpg on the highway is not exactly class-leading for a sub $20k car.
 
In short, Toyota took what was a hideous, underpowered but economical car with distinctive character, and turned it into a slightly less hideous car with bad fuel economy and no character. I don’t like either one, but at least the old one provokes me to the point of loathing, which actually somehow makes me respect it. The new one just tries not to offend (but still does) – kind of like Ned Flanders… only uglier.

1st gen xB photo copyright middle class motoring

2nd gen xB photo courtesy of wikipedia